Elemental Stitches

I am such a...

Oops!  I feel like such a doofus! I forgot that I switched my comments to must be approved!  So, I am soooooo sorry that I didn't respond to or approve your comments before now.  I was actually getting kind of bummed that I didn't have any comments.  Now I know that I did and it makes me feel oh so loved!

I have been having one of those weeks.  You know the ones where everyone is out to piss you off and you are completely on edge and you feel like you want to scream!

Yeah thats me... this whole week.  Today, after the last yelling match with my husband (this is rather unusual actually, we have an amazing relationship), we sat down on the deck and talked about how I am feeling like I am constantly working and getting nothing done.  I haven't been alone since we moved to Santa Cruz and I just needed some alone time.  He was feeling really under-appreciated.  He moved here with me so I could go to UCSC and he left a great job, his ailing father, and everyone he knows and he felt like I didn't appreciate his sacrifice.  Well, he was right.  I was being selfish and I didn't realize how much this was also affecting him and Brae.  I dont miss Palmdale one bit, I do miss my family and friends there but that place was holding us back.  After hours of working out our difficulties I decided that the rest of the day was for relaxing.

I went to Bookshop Santa Cruz for a few hours by myself, walked around downtown a bit and then went to Safeway at 9pm when the store was empty and I was alone to shop in peace.  While I was at Bookshop I found this book called I Was A Good Mom Until I Had Kids by Trisha Ashworth and Amy Nobile.  Its got a bright pink cupcake on the front so you cant miss it. 

This book is great!  Recently I introduced myself as, "Hi I am Melissa, Tom's wife and Brae's mom" and it hit me... I feel like I lost my identity.  The person who makes me, well me.  I love being a mother and wife, but I am also Melissa, student at UCSC or Melissa, avid sewer with her own online store, or Melissa, Professional Photographer and I want to be seen as those parts of me too.  This book is all about it!  It felt so good to read every page because every sentence helped take off so much pressure!  I am not the only one who feels overburdened with others expectations!

So tonight while I was home I decided that I needed more pick me ups, so I bought these...

Sorry for the funky Amazon.com arrow, but thats where I ordered them.  I cannot wait to get these!  I have seen so many creative things on the Bend the Rules Flickr site I cant wait to add my own.   The others are books I have picked up and put down so many times I cant count (if they keep talking to me I should just take them home so we can fully understand each other, right?).  I also came across this book which isn't out yet but looks super promising...

This woman really knows her way around an embroidery hoop!  I have never embroidered in my life and I am itching to learn.  I hope to learn from Sublime Stitching and from Crafty Daisies who is offering free embroidery lessons on her blog starting Tuesday!

Well its late and I am off to bed.  I did want to add one side note though.  I am cleaning out my fabric supply.  Yes, really!  So look for it up on my store's etsy site as well as a bunch of kitting books that I haven't used in a while.  I don't think I can sell those on etsy so they will probably go up on Amazon.com.  If anyone is interested please email me and I will work out a deal.  I will definitely be open to trading them for sewing books or supplies.

Seasonal Rythem

 

January brings the snow
Makes our feet and fingers glow.
February brings the rain
Thaws the frozen lake again.
      March brings breezes, loud and shrill,
Stirs the dancing daffodil.
April brings the primrose sweet,
Scatters daisies at our feet.
      May brings flocks of pretty lambs,
Skipping by their fleecy dams.
June brings tulips, lilies, roses,
Fills the children's hands with posies.
      Hot July brings cool showers,
Strawberries and gillyflowers.
August brings the sheaves of corn,
Then the harvest home is borne.
      Warm September brings the fruit,
Sportsmen then begin to shoot.
Fresh October brings a pheasant,
Then to gather nuts is pleasant.
      Dull November brings the blast;
Then the leaves are whirling fast.
Chill December brings the sleet,
Blazing fire and Christmas treat.

I did not write this but I really like it.  I found it here
      

On that thought... a nice relaxing day

It was a little cold at the beach today but we had a blast.

I love the warmth of the sand between my toes.

Why am I doing this?

When I started sewing I did it because I enjoyed it.  The same with blogging.  I haven't been enjoying it anymore.  I am so wrapped up in my own ridiculous deadlines that I have sucked all the fun out of it.   I look at my sewing area with dread sometimes and I beat myself up for not writing a blog entry in a couple of days.  So, screw that.

For now on, I sew because I want to, not because I need products.  I am going to sew what I like and not what I think people will buy.  I don't want to make it in the fashion world so why am I pushing myself like this?

As for blogging.  I love blogging so I am going to blog.  And I am going to blog for me, not for you (sorry).  I love the few readers I have and I hope you stick around.

Thanks for understanding.

Sunday Scribblings- Decision

Moving to Santa Cruz is the biggest decision I have made in my life.  For me, it was even bigger then deciding to have a child.   I have never lived  in any other town other then my hometown in Palmdale, California.  Palmdale was a small town when I was born, with just under 12,000 residents and a time warp problem (it was often said that going to the Antelope Valley was like stepping backward in time to the 40s and 50s, and not in a good way).  25 years later it is a gigantic booming city with over 140,000 residents (many moving from the scary parts of LA and bringing their scary teens with them, they seem to think that it will help their children get out of gangs, but instead their children are moving  their gangs to Palmdale). 

I learned what I needed in Palmdale, but I came to a time in my life where it was necessary to move on and grow.  I had lived in the same town for 25 years, a move was highly necessary!  Preparing to move here to Santa Cruz was a decision long in the making.  I had to make decisions to save money (something I am not good at but this has helped), where to live, what to bring and what to leave behind. 

In the end, I think this was the best decision I have made for myself and my family.  In Palmdale I felt that my life had stalled and I could no longer continue forwarding my goals if we stayed there.  In just two weeks in Santa Cruz that feeling of going forward has come back with a vengeance and we have grabbed change by the horns and are off.

Tired Relationship? Flirt a Little- Some Advice For Married Men

I am proclaiming today to be Flirt With Your Mate Day!

This week, several of our close friends have come to Tom and I complaining about how they don't have any fun anymore, they are always fighting with their wife/husband.  There is no spark. 

You know what we have to say about that...

If you flirt with your wife the way you flirt with the busty waitress at Hooters you would be getting laid a lot more often!  She wants you, to want her, like you did when you first saw her.  Yes, its romantic, but you love your wife and you want everything to get better.  So flirt a little!  And don't be an ass about it.

Things to Do to Flirt with Your Wife

1.  Buy her Flowers-  Buy real flowers from a florists shop, even get them delivered to her work and have the card say something like "Because you looked so beautiful this morning, Love, Husband".  Be more creative then roses and don't buy carnations, they are for dead people.

2.  Give her a sweet compliment in front of close friends or family-  Tell them how great she cooks, or that she can massage a headache away in minutes, or maybe that she is the best mother a child can ask for.  Make sure it is true, don't ever lie because she will not like that.  She may blush, she may fuss, but she liked it.  Don't do this one too often or it can be annoying.

3.  At home in private run your hands gently through her hair and down her back a few times and then kiss her softly-  Try while she is looking in the mirror or sitting at the computer.  Its the small signs of affection that we enjoy on a regular basis.

4.  Pretend she is your new girlfriend and treat her accordingly- Dinner (no kids), movie (something you both like), then take her home and seduce her.

5.  Engage in an intellectually stimulating conversation-  This is important.  Hopefully when you first started dating you had things in common that you talked about and bonded over.  You now must find new things to talk about and bond over.  And not just the children. 

This is the advice we gave the young men who came to us this week.   I think this is a common problem in new and aging relationships.  Tom and I often felt that we no longer had anything in common and that we didn't have anything interesting to talk about, so we had to find new things. 

Couples must experience new things together and go to new places together.  Then things to talk about will come naturally. 

Tom and I are planning on learning to sail in the 2 years we are in Santa Cruz.  We would love to visit my uncle who sails his beautiful ship around the Pacific and we want to prepare for that.  We are also looking into the festivals and farmers markets in the area to visit as well as other outdoor activities.  I hear their are some caves on campus and the college leads caving tours!  That sounds like fun!

So what are you waiting for!  Go flirt with your wife like she is the hottest thing you have seen in months!

The Pink Lady...is it a lady?

This weeks Sunday Scribblings is Eccentricity.  The very first thing that came to mind is the pink lady in Santa Cruz.  She/He? walks up and down the main drag everyday.  Then as I was looking for photos of the Pink Lady I found all sorts of other eccentric Santa Cruz photos.  Here are some highlights of my new town.

This is the pink (it looks like a guy, doesn't it?)  This person roams around the Mall area and it seems as if he is well known by the locals.

More pink things in Santa Cruz.  Do you see her hair?  And the surfboard too?

Not pink, but equally colorful.  These are street performers.  I never saw performers like this on Venice Beach or Santa Monica 3rd Street.  Santa Cruz is going to be an interesting place to live.  Visit this photo here. 

Another street performer.  A little research shows that this guy used to be a stockbroker.  Visit the flickr shot here.

This next pic is rather funny but I have to give you the link to it.  Its here

As I look through these photos I am coming across so many beautiful photos.  No wonder Santa Cruz is called paradise. 

This is what I cannot wait for, I think my soul is going to do a bit of healing in Santa Cruz.  In the Antelope Valley, where I grew up and still live, gets on average 7 inches a year according to weather people.  Having lived here my whole life I would say that the calculations are off.  And we have been in a drought since the 80s when it used to snow here regularly every winter.  This year we had half an inch of rain and it hasnt snowed more then a dusting of powder in over 5 years.  Santa Cruz gets 30 inches of rain a year and even this year with severe drought in Ca they still got 15 inches!  Look at these ,

I guess thats enough photos for one day.  Can you tell I can hardly think of anything else?  Well thats not exactly true...  I have nothing to do but sew all day so I have gotten a lot done, including the little pillowcase dress I was planning.  Here is a sneak peak.

I also found some more great pillowcases and tea napkins yesterday.  I am going to post tomorrow or maybe later tonight.  I am going to my mothers to clean all my stuff out of the garage.  Keep or Dump day, we will see what I find shopping in my mothers garage (by the way, she has a 3 car garage stuffed to the breaking point, its going to be a long day, can we say garage sale?) 

A Fresh Start

In this blog I promise to give you thoughtful insight, informative articles on a variety of subjects, and beautiful photography to brighten your day.  I will be posting more often, as well.

I hope you enjoy.

Has it Been A Week Already?

Wow I just realized that I haven't posted in over a week! I have been busy with school and sewing, cleaning and planning.

Yesterday I took down Pumpkin's bed. She has been sleeping on the couch for months and will not sleep in the bed. Right now we are in a one bedroom apartment and I am so happy to have my room back. In a few months she will have her own room and all of her things will go there. We will be painting her bed (it was a hand me down) and her dresser (needs hardware and maybe paint, I really like the shabby chic look of it). I cannot wait to move!

I haven't really talked about the apartment complex I manage and live in, mostly because there isn't much worthy of writing down and what is worthy, is usually a series of unfortunate events that I am drug into because I am manager.

So I have come up with a list of reasons why I cant wait to move...

1. I am moving from my desert hometown to the beach and forest.

2. I live in the ghetto, and its making me racist against my will... This is a long, complicated and controversial topic that I might get into later. I was never racist before and I don't want to be.

3. My apartment will get into the 90s in the summer if the air conditioner isn't always running, thank god I don't have to pay my electric bill (boss pays the bills, almost not worth it).

4. I have never met so many low lives in my life!

5. It is not safe to take my daughter to the local park (drug dealers, gangs, children with appalling behavior)

6. I would never put my kid in one of these schools.

7. I feel like many of the men are undressing me with their eyes... the scary part is I am probably right.

8. My whole life I have had a private outdoor space... until now. I am dying for at least some semi private space outdoors. An enclosed patio would suffice.

9. I want Pumpkin to have her own room.

10. I hate my dark brown carpet.

11. I hate a lot of my furniture and I am planning on taking most of it to the dump.

12. I want to let Pumpkin play outside in the grass and not be afraid of drugs, trash, broken glass, half empty alcohol bottles, etc in the filthy dirt (there is no grass, and they are going to tear out the sad bushes that are here an cover everything with concrete).

13. I origionally had 12 but after another frustrating conversation with maintenance I am soooooooooo happy to never have to work with the maintenance again. They are horrible! Lazy! Sexist! I hate dealing with them. They make my blood boil.

Those are 13, but there are so many more reasons. Lets not forget...
-get Tom away from abusive family
-start on second chapter of our life
-Last but certainly not least UCSC!!! Go Banana Slugs!!! (No Joke...)

Labels: College Life, Personal

Mother's Day

Mothers Day was very pleasant, just as I wished. Tom had to work so my mom picked up my daughter and I, and we went back to her house. My mothers house, no matter where it is, is a haven away from chaos. Friends and family are always welcome at anytime. They are fed and listened to, given advice and sent on their way, lighter and full of new possibilities.

It was nice to relax and play croquet, a game we haven't played as a family in a decade or more. My mom got me a gift certificate for the salon and I showed her the Amy Butler apron I would have had finished if I had my machine back in time, by the way that's the surprise. I am making one for myself and one for my mom. I cant wait until they are done! They are so beautiful!

So, tonight I have plans to clean up and reinstate my sewing machine in its rightful spot. And I have a bag that has been causing a lot of problems that needs a meeting with the needle. You will see him up on Scent of Rain soon. He is famous, the bag that tricked me into thinking my precious sewing machine was broken. Snatch him up quick... I think I will call him Loki...

Labels: Holidays, Humor, Personal, Sewing